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Make a Difference

Why We Should Make Discomfort a Priority

The Little Rock Nine knew discomfort.
The 101st Airborne Division escorts the Little Rock Nine to school. Those who suffer injustice have no choice but to experience discomfort. 

 

Note: Yes, this is part of my “Make a Difference” series. I’m experimenting with taking the series name out of the title of my blog posts. 

I recently started working for a seminary that offers chapel services twice a week. On February 13, just before the beginning of Lent, an M.Div. student preached from 2 Corinthians 6:3-10. The text refers to the experiences of many early Christ-followers, including beatings, imprisonments, and poverty. As the preacher linked the passage to the experiences of African Americans and to the season of Lent, I felt as if God were giving me a nudge. This is what Lent is about. It’s about being willing to face discomfort in the pursuit of a world filled with love, justice, kindness, goodness, and peace.

The first Christians understood what it meant to suffer. And despite advances in areas such as medicine, agriculture, and human rights since then, even the most privileged among us can still genuinely experience suffering. Mental illness, broken relationships, addictions, abuse… these things are present in the homes of the wealthy as well as the poor. But many of us don’t know the kind of suffering Paul was writing about — riots, prison, hunger (not merely a delayed meal but genuine hunger from lack of food) — these things are outside of my experience and, for most of my readers, yours as well. If we choose to give up something for Lent, we may suffer minor discomfort from self-denial, but we don’t really understand the struggles of those early Christians — or of people today who experience injustice.

It’s a wonderful thing to be able to practice one’s faith without facing the persecution that Paul describes. But there is value to discomfort that we may be missing if we lead comfortable lives.

Why is it good to be uncomfortable?

  • Discomfort goes hand-in-hand with growth. We know this. We just don’t like it. Ever watch a baby try something over and over again, until she gets it right? I still remember when my child would try to suck her thumb before she’d developed hand-eye coordination. She’d usually hit her face somewhere above her mouth and slide her thumb down to it. Then invariably her thumb would fall out of her mouth, and she’d have to start over again. She’s sometimes cry with frustration, but she kept trying. We can’t grow if we’re not willing to endure failure… and it is only through growth that we can give our best to the world.
  • Discomfort breeds resilience. This is directly related to a willingness to be bad at something before you can master it. When I first started working in higher education, I learned that the students who have to work really hard for their grades, even if they are “B” students, often succeed better than the naturally bright “A” students. These “B” students have a greater tolerance for failure and are willing to keep trying. The naturally bright students are often so used to having everything come easily that, when they actually have to work hard in a class in order to understand something, they will give up. We need to learn how to bounce back after encountering something difficult, but we can only do that if we learn to work through our discomfort.
  • Tolerance for discomfort helps us do the right thing. People often talk about a willingness to endure discomfort in order to reach a personal goal, such as a financial or fitness goal. But in addition to delaying gratification and being willing to suffer a little in order to retire early or run a marathon, we can practice these things in order to become better people. Whether you want to give more to charity or contribute less to global warming, you may have to deny yourself some comforts in order to successfully make a difference.
  • Through discomfort, we can relate to the oppressed. Yes, our willingness to temporarily enter into suffering is different from the daily suffering experienced by people without our privileges. But whether you choose to fast for a period of time in solidarity with the hungry or to join with the oppressed in protesting injustice, you can better understand the suffering that others go through if you are willing to take on discomfort that you otherwise would not have to experience.

Of course, suffering merely for the sake of suffering is meaningless. When we suffer, it should be in the pursuit of something better — a better life for others and for ourselves. The point of suffering is not to remain there, but to move through it toward our goal. We may be called to suffer in life, but that isn’t all we are called to. We’re called to relieve suffering, because suffering can become demoralizing and debilitating if the sufferer is unable to attain something better through their efforts.

But it’s so hard!

For the most part, we don’t naturally run toward discomfort. And, let’s face it, sometimes our everyday lives feel difficult enough that the last thing we want is more discomfort. At the end of a hard day, what we really want is to  relax with Netflix or a good book. I am, by nature, a Tookish hobbit. There’s a part of me that wants nothing more than to hang out in my snug hobbit hole with some sort delicious, mushroom-y meal. But there is another part of me that craves adventure, and with adventure comes discomfort. It’s not the part of adventure that most of us yearn for. We want to see the world without being rained on or running low on food, thank you very much. But you can’t have a real adventure without opening yourself up to being uncomfortable.

Even if you have no Tookish blood running through your veins, you can still stretch yourself in small ways. That’s because choosing to suffer for the sake of growth and a better world looks different for each of us. You may stop eating meat, because you are concerned about the treatment of farm animals. Your friend may decide to frequently visit their uncle with Alzheimer’s, even though he often forgets who they are. Your parents might invest lots of time, money, and energy into opening a business that employs former inmates. As for me? For the sake of our planet, I should probably learn to better tolerate the cold rather than cranking up the heat.

Each person needs to choose for themselves what they are willing to suffer. But one thing is certain: Though discomfort isn’t fun, it’s a necessary part of making a difference in the world.

 

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Something Wonderful

Something Wonderful: My Ten Favorite Superwomen

My favorite of all the spectacular superwomen
Bandette is amazing, adorable, and not the least bit humble.

 

In November, I wrote about The Spectacular Sisterhood of Superwomen. During that post, I mentioned that I had started reading several comics that were mentioned in the book.

Well, I’ve made my way through a pile of books, in addition to some comics available on the web. If anything, I’m even happier I read Hope Nicholson’s decade-by-decade list of “awesome female characters from comic book history.” I didn’t choose to read every comic mentioned in the book, and there were many I would have read, but I couldn’t get my hands on them. Of those I read, there were some characters or books that left me cold. But there were some I absolutely loved. Here’s my top ten list of characters I was introduced to through Nicholson’s book. Note that not all of them are characters she chose to feature, but I discovered these characters through her book. (Okay, that’s not completely true. I knew of Squirrel Girl. I’d just never read Squirrel Girl.)

10. Squirrel Girl (from Squirrel Girl)

Squirrel Girl is one of the silliest characters on this list, but that’s part of what makes her so wonderful. While I can and do enjoy a dark graphic novel or comic book series, sometimes it’s good to read something light. Squirrel Girl fits the bill. Considering the fact that her superpowers boil down to being a human squirrel with the power to communicate with squirrels, you wouldn’t expect her to be particularly powerful, but she is. It’s the sort of comic I’d pick for someone who was at home with a nasty cold — assuming that person was open to reading comic books!

Hannah Marie from Scary Godmother

9. Hannah Marie (from Scary Godmother)

Nicholson picked the titular character from Scary Godmother for her list. Certainly, Scary Godmother is lots of fun. She knows all of the coolest ghouls, and she’s the sort of person I’d love to sit down with for a cup of tea. But her close human friend, Hannah Marie, is ridiculously cute and so fond of Halloween that I can’t help but love her. When it looks like Halloween might not happen, Hannah Marie takes charge, working hard to do what she thinks needs to be done. She bites off more than she can chew and makes mistakes, but she is, after all, a very small and very determined child.

Beth Ross from Prez

8. Beth Ross (from Prez)

Set in a disturbingly believable dystopian future, Prez features Beth Ross, a teen-aged president who should never have been elected. Unfortunately for the real candidates, age no longer matters, but popularity does, and Ross has recently become an Internet sensation. Completely ignorant of how to play the political game, Ross immediately starts trying to make a difference, and she makes a lot of enemies in the process. It looks like there have been no new issues of Prez after volume 1 came out in 2015. Too bad. The series had a lot of potential.

Sister Peaceful from Castle Waiting

7. Sister Peaceful (from Castle Waiting)

Nicholson chose Jain from Castle Waiting, but I prefer Sister Peaceful. It’s rare to find positive depictions of faith in comics. Marvel is actually pretty good at doing this — from Nightcrawler in the X-Men to Kamala Khan in Ms. Marvel, there are a number of wonderful characters who belong to some sort of faith tradition. While Sister Peaceful belongs to a fictitious order of bearded nuns, the Solicitines, the order is clearly a Christian one, and Peaceful, mischievous as she is, is a real woman of faith. In fact, part of what I love about her is her fun-loving spirit. Peaceful is loving, not judgmental — the sort of person you’d seek out as a friend. Volume One of this series, the only one I’ve been able to get my hands on so far, includes a long section on Sister Peaceful’s backstory.

6. Beauty (from Megan Kearney’s Beauty and the Beast)

This webcomic isn’t even featured in Nicholson’s book; she just quotes the comic’s creator in her section on Annabelle from Nightmares and Fairytales. When I looked up comics that were in this book, however, I didn’t confine myself to the ones from which she drew her list of superwomen. I also searched for several that Nicholson mentioned in passing. One of those was Beauty and the Beast.

It took me several pages to really get into it, but once I did, I was hooked. Part of this was because I’ve always loved that particular fairy tale. Kearney is relatively faithful to the story, although she adds some nice touches, such as making Beauty’s sisters pleasant people instead of spoiled brats and having Beauty genuinely wrestle with her feelings about the being she sees as her jailer, albeit a kind-hearted jailer. But honestly, part of my enchantment is because Kearney writes a darned good slow-burn romance. Although I know how the story will turn out, as long as Kearney remains faithful to it, I still find myself awaiting each update to see what happens next.

Kamau Kogo from Bitch Planet

5. Kamau Kogo (from Bitch Planet)

Without being the least bit like A Handmaid’s Tale, Bitch Planet is its comic book equivalent. In Bitch Planet, women are subservient to men, and the most powerful men are referred to as “father.” Non-compliant women are imprisoned on Bitch Planet. The situation seems utterly hopeless, but there are still women — and men — who are willing to fight the system. Issues of this comic tend to end with smart-alecky ads for products like Agreenex, which “doesn’t change your circumstances, but… keeps you from caring.” There are several strong female characters in the series. Nicholson featured Penny Rolle, who certainly is an awesome character, but so far my favorite is the extremely badass Kamau Kogo.

Martha Washington

4. Martha Washington (from The Life and Times of Martha Washington in the Twenty-First Century)

Partway through Martha Washington, it occurred to me that there are probably several liberals and conservatives in its fanbase. Martha lives under a series of different governments, and all of them are deeply flawed. The conservatives are oppressive. The liberals are ineffective and corrupt. Even groups that truly mean to look out for the greater good go bad in the end. Through it all, Martha does her best to follow her conscience and fight for what she believes is right.

Maika Halfwolf from Monstress

3. Maika Halfwolf (from Monstress)

I almost didn’t read Monstress. I knew I could expect violence and gore, and the first volume delivered just that. But it was a stunningly beautiful comic with a character who truly wrestles with an inner demon. Along with Bitch Planet and Martha Washington, this is another dark, dystopian story, but this one is set in a magical world that clearly isn’t Earth. Maika looks human, but she is really an Arcanic, part of a magical race that is at war with human beings. She’s extremely powerful, and her companions are terrified of her, but as one of them explains, “I followed you. I thought it would be safer. You’re good at killing.” Grim as this series is, I’m eagerly awaiting the next volume.

Patty-Jo

2. Patty-Jo (from Patty-Jo ‘n’ Ginger)

Nicholson picked Torchy Brown for her book. I’m glad she did, because that character led me to the biography of her creator, Jackie Ormes. The story behind the biography itself is fascinating: author Nancy Goldstein, an expert on dolls, was helping a friend research the Patty-Jo doll and became fascinated with Ormes. Ormes was the first African American woman cartoonist, but she left behind few personal papers, and it was impossible to find many of the newspapers in which her work appeared. Goldstein conducted interviews with people who’d known Ormes and dug up as much information as she could to tell Ormes’ story and reproduce samples of the four comics she created — two single-panel comics and two Torchy Brown comic strips.

Torchy Brown is a career woman and romantic heroine who appeared first in the 1930s and later in the 1950s. I can see why Nicholson might include her, but I was far more interested in the precocious little girl, Patty-Jo, from Ormes’ longest running comic, Patty-Jo ‘n’ Ginger. While Ormes did include social commentary in her other comics, Patty-Jo ‘n’ Ginger was where she really let loose with commentary on everything from racism to McCarthyism. Learning about Jackie Ormes was probably the greatest discovery I made as a result of Nicholson’s book.

1. Bandette (from Bandette)

Like Squirrel Girl, Bandette is a light-hearted comic with a heroine you can’t help but love. Bandette considers herself the greatest thief in the world, and she very well may be. But while she loves to steal, she hates villainy, and she’ll frequently aid the police in bringing down criminal masterminds. She has a weakness for chocolate, and I was very disappointed when I found that her favorite candy bar, Chocobolik, isn’t real. Her friends adore her, and even some of her enemies, such as the swashbuckling assassin Matadori, can’t help but become her friends. Every time I finish a volume, I want to visit Paris. If I manage to go, I may find myself wishing that a gravity-defying, big-hearted thief would pop out of nowhere and ask me for a chocolate bar.

Have you read The Spectacular Sisterhood of Superwomen? If so, what wonderful superwomen has Nicholson introduced you to through her book?

 

 

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Make a Difference

Make a Difference: Fight Age Discrimination

face of an older man

When you think of age discrimination, you probably think of discrimination against older people in the workplace. Certainly age discrimination encompasses that. I’ve witnessed more than one person in their 50s or 60s who, after losing their job, struggled to find a comparable position — or sometimes any position at all. Some of the people I’ve seen suffer the most are in technical fields. Sometimes people fail to keep their skills up to date, but sometimes they aren’t hired because they are “too old.”

But age discrimination goes beyond employment discrimination against older people. It can include infantilizing older people through the way you speak to them. Calling an older woman “young lady”? You may mean to flatter her, but she knows she’s not young and probably doesn’t appreciate your “compliment.” It also includes the way you treat older people. I love what this post on alcohol in assisted living facilities has to say about the purpose of assisted living: “Assisted living does not and should never mean loss of freedom or rights, instead it promoted [sic] independence by providing seniors the tools and care they need to live the best life they can.”

And just as bad as treating seniors like children is pushing them aside or ignoring them altogether.

I also believe that age discrimination doesn’t just apply to older adults. When a member of one generation looks down on members of another generation, that’s a form of discrimination. I once heard someone in the workplace state that Millennials were lazy and spent too much time watching Netflix. Many of the Millennials I know work really hard — both in the office and outside of it. I should have spoken up on their behalf but didn’t; I allowed myself to feel intimidated by the person who made the statement and just sat in stony silence. It is true that the environment in which a generation grows up shapes the members of that generation. Nevertheless, members of each generation are individuals and should be treated as such. Judgmental statements about generations, such as “Boomers ruined the world” or “Gen Xers are slackers,” are no better than judgmental statements about people based on categories such as gender or race.

And now I’m going to make what may be a controversial statement about age discrimination. In the past five years or so, I’ve run across many people who declare vehemently that not only do they hate babies and/or children, but that such an attitude is perfectly okay. I believe that hating babies or children is just as unacceptable as hating senior citizens.

I absolutely do not believe that everyone should become a parent. One of the most troubling experiences I’ve ever had was conversing with a mother of two school-aged boys. I’d only just met her, but during our conversation she confided that she hated her children. I was not a parent, so her confession prompted me to do a lot of soul-searching before my husband and I decided to become parents. I think that’s a good thing to do; parenthood is not something to undertake lightly.

But there’s a big difference between not wanting children and hating children as a group of people. You don’t have to drool over babies. You don’t have to be happy that you’re sitting near a baby on a plane (while I don’t believe in banning parents from taking babies on planes, air travel is not particularly pleasant, and a crying baby just makes things worse).

But take a look at the last paragraph of the opinion piece I linked to:

If you are my friend and you decide to have a baby, I will feel nothing but genuine joy for you, because as your friend, I value your happiness. I will bring you meals and toys and those adorable little baby shoes (which I will find far cuter than the kid itself), and I will always lend a sympathetic ear when you’re tired and need to vent. I will do so with glee and sincerity, because you are my friend and I love you. But I will still hate your baby, and for that, I will not apologize.

What if I rewrote that to tell someone that I would feel joy for them and bring them a present on their wedding day but would hate their spouse — not because the person they were marrying was horrible, but because I didn’t like “that kind” of person? I think people would be right to call me on my discriminatory attitude. So why is it okay to say about babies?

Some people call age discrimination the last acceptable form of discrimination. I’m not sure I agree with that statement. But age discrimination may be less visible to us than some forms of discrimination. It’s time to notice it and take a stand against it.

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Something Wonderful

Something Wonderful: Pop Chalee

Book about Pop Chalee

I’ve wanted to write about Pop Chalee for a while, but I’ve struggled to find images I could include here. I finally decided to write about her anyway. Some of the links below will take you to pictures of her work.

Pop Chalee, born Merina Lujan, was given the Tiwa name that she preferred by her paternal grandmother. I’ve usually seen her name translated as “Blue Flower.” During her childhood, her parents divorced. She spent some of her childhood raised by paternal relatives at Taos Pueblo in New Mexico and attending the U.S. Indian School in Santa Fe. During her teen years, she went to live with her European mother in Salt Lake City; however, she was treated so poorly that she ran away and got married. She didn’t begin studying art until she was well into her adulthood, but once she began painting, she quickly achieved success. There are even suggestions that her deer influenced Disney’s Bambi, because Walt Disney purchased one or more of her paintings before the movie’s animation work started.

I don’t remember a time when I did not know Pop Chalee’s art. I spent part of my childhood in the southwestern United States and had many relatives in New Mexico. Running across her art was almost natural. Several of her paintings, commissioned by Howard Hughes, are in the Albuquerque Airport (or “Sunport,” as they call it), including her prominently displayed horse mural. I must have seen her art other places, too; her unforgettable horses and forest scenes are engraved in my mind.

Pop Chalee is probably best known for horses that stepped straight out of a fantasy world and deer leaping through magical forests, but she also painted several works featuring Native American dancers and hunters. Her paintings are colorful and have a sense of motion.

Pop Chalee also worked as a dorm matron for young scientists working on the Manhattan Project. I was excited to find a video of her while I was doing research for this post; unfortunately, the interview is about her memories of Los Alamos, not her work as an artist. (There’s a wonderful bit toward the end where the interviewer asks about the son of potter Maria Martinez, and Pop Chalee is far more interested in talking about Martinez than about her son.)

You can view Pop Chalee’s art in her biography, at the Albuquerque Sunport, and in various museums, particularly the Millicent Rogers Museum in Taos, New Mexico, and the Heard Museum in Phoenix, Arizona.